My memory pool should actually be quite shallow - relatively that is - unable to genuinely "miss those days." But college is over for me, and I do "miss those days," those people, even that place. ResLife staff and the late night get togethers. Seems like ages ago now. Relocation does that, and we've relocated a few times since then.

It sure felt good - coffee and games, with a run to the bakery in between. Living on day old muffins and whatever the change in our pockets could buy. It was natural, we weren't afraid of empty pockets - only tomorrow's exam.

And we laughed - we laughed until our sides hurt or until we broke something. We laughed in the face of danger - and when life sucked, we blew stuff up. It was our therapy.

I could use some therapy.

I gather sweet and bitter of yesterday's collection - long halls with many doors filled with cursing, loves, addictions. Conversation and a feel-good drag linger in the windowsill, while moon trades places with the sun, and heat replaced with chill. Smitten souls seek solace with their backs against brick walls mingling philosophy and last night's game with breath from pipes and menthols. Long walks for harbored thoughts, profound or stupid all the same - we weren't pretending anymore, the gloves were off, we felt no shame. For bottles held around the fire serve to remind us friends, that bottles now raised separately, this prost is not the end.

Mossy Rat Brewing Co.

Est. 2008

Elijah, Ross, Micah, Matt, Matt, Andrew (Taco)

Something less real - a dip into fantasy or imagination - and letting it play out. When you hear the whole song, it makes more sense. But for now, I can live with the silly-ness of that mental picture.

An invitation to hold on, observe, and find appreciation for the puzzle piece that doesn't look quite right. Wait for it, there might be good in the injured tomato plant. How real is that? The wind sweeping whole plants into the sky, then dropping it like it's hot? Yep - total fiction.

Well, that is only until it actually happens. Then what? Will you know what to do? A bad something only imaginable before suddenly happens. That 'something less real' before is real now. Can it be appreciated? Can we thank God for them?

Thank? What the hell for - a ruined tomato plant? That would be idiotic...

But I had something to care for while she was away... and it made me feel better, if only after the fact. The story ends now, not as everything was, but the way it needed to be. And it started out as something less real...

Reflecting on the past 4 years, I am thankful for the friends who made this journey so memorable.  Denison Witmer's song "Steven" says it best...

This was the first year of our years together
Your mother got sick and your sister got married
This was the first year of our songs together
Simple chords are lovely
Simple words are heartfelt

It is the best friends that

need you
In my case, believe you
It's the best friend's lives' kiss you
In my case, I'll miss you

You were there on Queen Street when I was feeling down
When every word I said felt like it meant nothing
The only one I had that understands my blues
Is making big predictions of life on the west coast soon

It's the best friends that make you
Sometimes they break you
It's the best friends that move you
In my case, see through you

It's the best friends that need you
Sometimes they leave you
It's the best friend's lives' kiss you
In my case, I'll miss you

It's the best friends that make you
Sometimes they break you
It's the best friends that move you
In my case, see through you

It's the best friends that need you
In my case, believe you
It's the best friend's lives' kiss you
In my case, I'll miss you

Cheers friends, and many blessings

So we've made a decision...

Graduation brings with it anxiety about finishing and finding something new to grab hold of.  A transition and change that is never comfortable.  It is exciting and challenging, yet frightening because we enter the unknown.  We cross this bridge, looking back to the familiar and safe, following our feet toward the shadowy future; the undefined blobs on the other side our allies or foes?  Either way, God watches over us, protecting us and providing for us.  We have been blessed!

We chose to move back to Grand Rapids, to a place familiar yet frightening.  My fears of becoming something I do not want to become give me reason to challenge the status quo.  Calvin Theological Seminary and its new program offer a holistic approach to ministry in a society that is diverse and in need of love.  We are at peace, and overwhelmed with blessings. 

Our Dordt education has been shaped and informed so much by family and friends, and it is something that we wouldn't trade for anything.  Thank you to all of our friends who have journeyed with us, challenged us, fought with us and loved with us.  Blessings as we all leave this place!

The howling & heaving of another Iowa afternoon.  Precipitation pounds like fists, sideways, like a thousand little knuckles at once.  And when the wind isn't howling, it seems to laugh.  I am unwilling to fight you today; you are relentless.  Like a child begging for attention, your persistence remarkable. 

Am I too impatient with nature?  Is this merely a dissonant chord in the song nature sings?  Something to enjoy rather than rebuke?

Hardly enjoyable, except if watching from the other side of a window.  Somehow, I manage to complain about something in creation - perhaps I'm the child...

This is something I wrote a while ago, but it seems applicable with the weather recently

That was a damn good thought!

I love to read the blogs of family and friends - A good friend wrote about the power of food, particularly carefully prepared food.  The aromas, tastes, feelings, and sights of food transcend time and place:  Traditional Italian prepared in the small kitchen can still communicate a powerful love and bring people together, even though it may be removed from its original setting and time.  Beautiful!  Delicious, perhaps!

Food and fellowship are part of what makes this world such a beautiful place!  The sting of an onion in the nose, makes one cry (perhaps with emotion after all?), and love can be communicated by this relatively small vegetable.  When combined with a symphony of other flavors and smells, the result delivers a sweeping smile to my face.  Laughter ensues, eyes closed tightly with head tipped back.  Oh it is bliss.

Food and fellowship makes me happy, makes my heart glad, makes my soul sing.  Here is to many more delicious recipes!  Prost!

A THOUGHT ABOUT THAT "BRAT"

There's something Biblical about that spoiled brat --
Hear me out... A while back I watched the film "Fools Gold", and there is a character in this film who is a spoiled brat. My first reaction was exactly that, "What a spoiled brat!" A character who gets whatever she wants and is forced to spend some quality time with dear old daddy. He's got money alright, and loves to bless his daughter, but she takis it all for granted. At one point she says, "I don't want your money! Except for food... and clothes... and rent... and..."

It's like God's relationship with Israel in Jeremiah 2-4. Israel is a whore, always returning and returning again. God wants to bless his peole, but they take it for granted and search for more. Those spoiled brats...

God longs for His children to return to him! He's got a plan, in fact he had a plan far before you and me. What amazing grace to see beauty in my whorish acts!

Those are characteristics we love to hate too, eh? The whore? Funny, because from the throne room, God's got nothing but love for those characters.

AND THE BATTLE RAGES

I'm back, after a respite from this digital world.
Today I...
-thought about painting
-about ate moldy bread
-wore a new shirt
-appreciated art

Just a brief update, and a warning that more thoughts are on their way.
The imagination is endless, isn't it?